Before Opening the Door

A relative of mine was telling how they were stressing out at work and were worried about taking that stress home with them. That note reminded me of how much stress we all bring home from work or school. And how, if we're not careful, can allow that stress to tear apart the one place that should be our sanctuary, our home.

  After being in the workforce for 30 years, I can safely say stress from work has increased a number times over since I started working full time. And if your one of the fortunate few that work and go to school, Lord help you. Over the past several years, I've been lucky to learn stress coping techniques from some of my employers, especially when I briefly worked in corrections.

 One of the main things I remember was to realize after a bad day the need to decompress. That your loved ones at home are not the cause of the work related problem, nor are they your punching bag. Other than drinking yourself silly at the nearest "happy hour" (which can cause a lot more trouble) here's a few things I've learned, and could remember myself sometimes.

 1. Either at work or first thing when you get home. Pull off that work-related uniform. Now this may sound logical for someone in an actual uniform. But even if your in a suit and tie or your best heels and skirt change into your home team colors, your comfy jeans, sweats, whatever. I find the for me after a day of meetings, switching out of the "monkey suit" is better than a three-finger cocktail. 

 2. Exercise. For those who are active, I don't have to tell you how important this one is to your mental state. Some businesses provide gym equipment to their employees, so take advantage of it. For others it could be a walk around the block and spin on the bike. Sweat is a great de-stresser. 

 3. Make time for your family. This one works because I've used it. After a stressful day, My wife has never not lent me her ear to allow me to vent. Not to cuss her out, but to vent about a situation calmly. And while you are at it, be a sounding board for her day too. Another important thing is make time for the kids. This can go hand and hand with exercise,  believe me kids can wear you out and their laughter can make you forget all about those idiots at work.

 4. Quit making excuses. If you know your stress is causing problems at home then fix it. Use some of these suggestions, come up with your own. Just realize that one blow-up at home can become two real fast. Remember, to decompress before opening the door. 

Realize these are simple suggestions. If you feel the problem is deeper, don't hesitate to seek professional help. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Fail-Safe

Image
Through the paper-thin walls of this old house, I can hear my neighbors getting ready for another day. Laying here remember when I used to do that, working at night so I could take care of the kids, while my wife went to work. Yesterday sorta marked a tipping point for me I suppose. I finally got my consultation with the gastroenterologist. So we are working the set-up some tests my primary care physician has been wanting for me to have for months. While I would love nothing more than to tell my PCP, “I told you so”. But I suppose knowing is better than not knowing. Although I do find some comfort in ignorant bliss.  I get the impression some people feel I am an optimist. But I like to think of myself more as a realist. What some may mistake as optimism is actually nothing more than analytics. Where I breakdown a given situation and create a solution. That may sound cold and frankly less romantic. But you must understand, after living so long in a void of no emotion (due to
Read more

Moments You've Lived

Image
It’s 5:15 in the afternoon and my stupid ass is back outside. I just checked the phone and it’s a balmy 90° with a feel like temperature of 99°f. I figured since I was hot in the room with the AC on, I might as well come outside and do same thing. Earlier I read a funny meme from my sibling on Facebook that read, “Can someone send me a hug?” copy and share. Rather sarcastically I replied, “We are not huggers , didn’t we grow up in the same house?” Probably no truer words have ever been spoken about our lives as kids. Oh, we weren’t beaten or overly abused, we were just not raised all “touchy feely”. Not surprisingly most kids of our generation weren’t raised that way either. We were provided for in our working class suburban homes. It’s just that a lot of time wasn’t devoted to things like feelings and emotions. You were expected to tough it out and swallow those tears. I guess one place where we could let our emotions go was church. Raised during the infancy of the “Pentecostal Moveme
Read more

Blowing Breeze

Image
It’s later in the afternoon so I decided to take advantage of the lighter humidity and come back outside. There’s a lite breeze blowing so while the gnats are still out, at least they’re having to put in some extra effort to lite on me. You can still smell where the grass got cut this morning, but sadly the faint scent of BBQ from the restaurant down the street is gone.  The poor old sycamore tree leaves look a bit sad. Hanging like they’re on their last leg from the limbs. There’s no point in bringing up the fig bush/tree, it’s all but shed most of its leaves. It’s hard to believe that just a few months ago both plants were vibrant and green, with a bountiful crop of figs. But the birds have mostly abandon their nest in the fig branches. With the kids grown and the shade and food supply dried up, I can’t say I blame them.  But I’m the human here, I’m adaptable with opposable thumbs. I can’t move on as easily as the birds. My so-called cognitive reasoning insist I stick aro
Read more