Good Morning

George the Duck

 

Had another hard night sleeping till I woke up around 4:30 this morning. Then around 6:00 the phone kept pinging repeatedly by my “Waljacked Shopper” asking about substitutes on my order. Other than that, I’m not the snotty mess I was yesterday, I think the replenishing of lost fluids did the trick. While part of me thinks it’s way too early to be doing any high functioning thinking this morning, the more cynical side of me reminds me there’s never too much high functioning going on anyway. So with all my Southern Baptist charm, let me extend to you a “Good Morning, Ya’ll!”.

I can’t seem to get my mind out of the future tense. Meaning my mind is focused on things that are to take place down the road and not right now. I doubt I have to tell you how that can create mistakes in the moment, much less anxiety about the future. But with my already hyped up brain planning as it does. I can’t help but worry about the logistics of an upcoming medical procedure I am going to have. So here my mind sits rolling over every scenario it can to plan for the worse. Totally ignoring the training on the here and now that says, plant good seed and wait patiently for them to grow.

But here I am, just like the detailed Systems Analyst I was trained to be. Overthinking every point, every detail of the project before it even starts. But I was a good Project Manager, even when handling things around the house I don’t get into a panic, I take a breath and figure things out. But with my Fight or Flight switches still set on high, I can’t help but fear the future. No more then that small bird hanging around my windowsill.  

#Anxiety #HereAndNow #Fear #Breathe #Zen


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