Stories - FD Thornton

Believe it or not, I'm always looking for the next big thing. Rather it's a more challenging job or simply an interesting book to stimulate my mind, I thrive on that stimulation. Recently, I read about a challenging position in Dublin so I applied. Usually it's going to be at least a few weeks before you hear back, if at all. But to my surprise it was over the course of a weekend when I got the Dear John email from the company. I wished I had old girlfriends and ex's that broke it off that politely.  What happened to me than was a feeling of "being robbed". For whatever reason I take these things personally, but if I'm really honest, I know why I'm mad. It's because I'm aware of my skills and know what I can and can't do. Although I'm pretty sure my resume just didn't make it past the company's resume screener, it doesn't make me any less pissed.  I suppose I could harp on back in the "good old days" when a h...

I usually think of myself as being fairly adventurous and loving a challenge. But honestly I’ve been questioning that idea simply because of how complacent I’ve gotten. Used to it wasn’t anything to hop into my car and go where ever. Now I avoid leaving home or just going to be going. While for me isolation can be quite suffocating, the friends I once had are now few and far between. I’m sure it’s a side effect of my panic and anxiety but truthfully it’s not how I want to be. Inside while I still feel terror when going to new places. I long for new places and new challenges. It’s sort of twisted Jekyll & Hyde my mind plays with me. Some may ask, why don’t you just bite the bullet and go? While that may seem like the simple solution, in reality it’s a bit more complicated. Anxiety can cause some powerful triggers to go into motion. It can cause confusion, disorientation, and make you believe far worse is happening then it really is. The first thing you want to do is run a...

You ever have one of those mornings when you get up, the sun is shining and it’s not too hot. You go into the kitchen make your first cup of coffee that's just right and you can even hear the birds are signing outside your window. So you take in a deep breath and just know it’s gonna be a perfect day. Know what I mean? After a warm morning shower you get dressed in your favorite outfit and head to the office. All your favorite tunes from the 80’s are playing on the radio as you to hit all the green lights on the way to work. Then as you pull into the parking lot and see your favorite spot isn’t taken and you pull in. Wow, how good a day is this going to be, right? As you walk into the office you notice Bob in the cube next to yours decided not to shower in Old Spice this morning, instead he may have actually taken a shower. In the break room the crew left two untouched donuts in the box and an actual pot of fresh coffee on the burner. You wonder if for a minute you are ...

While the dog days passed over a week ago according to the calendar. You wouldn’t know from where I’m standing with the temperature hitting only 92 degrees, the heat index put it at over 100 degrees. Needless to say I’m sweating like a pig even after a cold shower. At this point I wonder why I’m telling anyone this. I guess my need to write and tell a story trumps my fatigue from sweating and working on yet another research paper. But hell, isn’t that why we do what we do? It’s not like I make any real money creating reports it’s the fact I love what I do. For a person who’s not into puzzles, I do love discovering things and part of my job is discovering things. Things that need a clearer focus or just need to be straightening out. That’s my passion. So as uncomfortable and broke as I am, I hone my craft every day. Looking for the right customer or business that appreciates what I bring to the table. A curiosity to find the problem, a methodical determination to solve the proble...

Over the past three days I’ve typed and posted so much on my class site, am seriously thinking of having a turn off that damn phone and computer day. Leaving myself with just my thoughts and giving my old brain a rest. That would be nice, but considering that my smartphone’s been blinking every few minutes with a new question or most answer email. All I can really do is sit quietly in my dark office and listen to some light classical music, till this damn phone blinks again.   I sometimes wonder if we a surpassed ourselves when it comes to technology. By that I mean, has technology become too taxing for our minds to handle it? It doesn’t seem to be the case for this current generation. Maybe it’s not so much about age as it has to do with environment. By that I mean, for me living with a wiring problem that doesn’t tolerate a lot of stress already. Maybe I’m conditioned to the slow-paced environment I am in, so when stress does come I have a place to escape. It kinda sou...

Every day we tell our story and we make connections. That’s the way it’s supposed to be isn’t it, making connections? For myself I’m just a very small fish in a very big ocean. Timid and shy, not wanting to make too many waves. Yet here I am putting word out for hundreds of thousands of people to see. For why too many years I thought of myself as being unworthy of anything, even with the miracle of a loving wife and great kids, that’s simply how I felt. You may ask what changed, how did you find your way out? The best answer I can give is watching my wife and kids and wanting the best for them. How could I be an example of success without having any success? At least that’s what I thought at the moment. But over time and with each small victory I learned, that not only was I blazing a trail for my children, I was making a trail for myself. Now this road has been anything but easy. But if nothing else it has been quite an adventure. From the beginning of this journey what u...

As the political season begins to stir (and I remember what my grandma said about stirring a chamber pot) the political groupies come out to play. For a long time I had an opinion and for a long time, I kept that opinion to myself. In hindsight that looks like the way to go this political season as well.  Between the doomsayers on the left and the doomsayers on the right, pretty much nothing is gonna make anybody happy, no matter which way the wind blows. Now I got nothing against anyone speaking their mind, just be mindful about who's property you're standing on while you do it. Respect is the key.  I think of myself as a guy just living his life. Is life perfect? No. Can I deal with it till I can find a way to change it? Yes. It's all about balance. My wife, the beautiful, sweet, loving women she is, can sometimes irritate the living crap out of me. And I'm more than sure she can say the same. Still me have been married since 1987 with either side giving a...

Amicalola Falls State Park Georgia For too long I worried about fitting in. Overthinking that the parts of me that made me unique we’re the parts of me that made me worthless. It took me a while to figure it out that one’s individuality is one’s strength. Or maybe I just got to the point where I don’t really give a rat’s ass anymore? Either way it’s true. For far too long I’ve allowed myself to be a roadblock. When I started my adventure going back to college, I had a certain set of goals in mind. But since that time things have changed and so have my priorities. Since earning my bachelor’s in 2012, my goals had changed. I felt like there was more to learn, so I started to pursue my MBA. Now it’s August 2015 and my MBA journey is nearly complete. The goals I had originally set out to complete have changed, but not my attitude toward completing my program. The road toward this end has been full of twists and turns and many times I wanted to quit.  If I have learned anythin...