Stories - FD Thornton

As some may well know, I'm very close to my Graduation from college. For a number of years I tried to attend a few institutions in my area to get my degree. Through each of these schools I tried my hand at a few various degree programs, ranging from technical to medical. But for a really good reasons, I couldn't complete any of the programs I started.  So for a while I allowed myself to believe that maybe I just wasn't good or smart enough to make it through college. But you know it kept nagging at me that I wasn't setting a good example for my kids. That is was not setting a good example for myself. You see, must of my life I've been plagued with the idea that I'm never good enough. If you really knew me you'd say, really? But it is very, very true.  Anyway, back to my story. A little over 3 years ago I discovered the school I now attend. I attend this school as an online student. At this point the name of the school or even my degree program are not th...

I've had a lot of different jobs over my life. I've worked construction laying highways, build homes, made cabinets, laid brick and block, painted, printed, worked in a warehouse, ran a warehouse, purchasing agent, receiving clerk, quality control, grocerer, meat cutter, produce man, security guard, supervisor, corrections officer. I think you get the picture. Now some of these jobs I liked, some I loved, most I hated. But hey, I got up each day and I worked. Well for nearly four years I've been back at school. For two of those years I've been laid-off. So I guess you could say, I'm ready to wear pants again and go back to work. I only got two problems in my way: 1. Someone to hire me. 2. Someone to hire me.  You know, I've been laid-off more times than I care to count. Anyone who's worked construction knows that feeling, when the unemployment office people know you by first name and have your coffee ready. (Maybe not that.) But you get what I mean. So h...

You ever sit down and just let your mind wonder Not focusing on any one thing Just simple taking in what you see I do that sometimes, from the rocker on my porch Maybe I'll see a car or watch a bird on the ground Drinking in what the world presents me It's at these times where I find the present A point in time where it all fits Where planning and worry have no place You ever find yourself wanting that A place where tomorrow's plan melts away Where you can be in the moment Well at some point find yourself a spot Where you can focus solely on what you see Clear your mind, breathe and live in that time FD Thornton 2012 

I was sitting on my front porch a few hours ago, when I saw not one but two rare sights. Bicycles. I know, it's amazing isn't it? It has been years since I've seen a bike on the street. You usually see them only on TV or in France or both. Even rarer still was the fact that the bike was being ridden by a kid! The other bike I saw was being ridden by a young women. Her bike was a standard old school beach-type bike with a basket and everything. For a moment I thought I'd smoked my pipe a little too much this morning and was having flashbacks to 1969. Just seeing two different people rides bikes on the same day is pretty amazing. Considering our city has more four-wheeler's & golf carts then cars or people. For a minute it got me thinking about 1969 in a way. Because, during does years around Christmas & Birthdays that what we looked forward to, a new bike. Oh, a few adventurous teens might have gotten a mini-bike or go-cart, but for us younger ones it was a...

I know that for me, I'm reopening an old subject. But sometimes things can creep into your mind that you thought you sweep out a while back. I have been asked to tell the story of myself and to be honest for some that's not a hard thing to do. We as people love to discuss our favorite subject, ourselves, all the time. If that were not true why is Mark Zuckerberg a billionaire? For me I guess really talking about myself brings up a lot of ghost. Ghost of memories like being bullied or laughed at by my peers. Ghost of the masks I wore to let them think it didn't bother me. The sense of humor I developed to at least get them to like me. The things that many of us lived through everyday while growing up.  So when someone actually wants to hear my story, to know who I am, I kinda freak out. I begin to hear those same ghost all over again. It's funny how the past continues to define us. How everyday you either embrace the voices or you push them away. It's never an ea...

In what appears as an cold impersonal world we live in. We as humans cannot seem to shake our need to be social and connected. Even though we now lock ourselves in at work, lock ourselves in our cars, and then lock ourselves in our homes. We fire up our computers, smartphones, and tablets, just to connect and socialize.  I posted about a video that I saw where social media may be on the way out. But thinking about that, I don't think that will ever happen. Because as humans we have a need to socialize and connect. Plus I feel we have a normal need not to be alone.  So while social media like Facebook, Google+, or this blog, may have underlying reasons for being around. They do serve us from being too isolated in the lock-ups we have created for ourselves. While we serve out our sentences we created for ourselves.    

Morning Rain. Watched it begin to rain this morning Light, then heavy and strong And from my limited view I thought How perfect I lite my pipe and drank my joe Watching the smoke rings As they hit the top of the pouch and thought How perfect Looking out I thought of nothing Simple watching the raindrops Come over the edge and hit the steps, thinking How perfect Even from one's limited view, one can see perfection It may be a bird on a branch, or a child at play Still, it is perfection In such an imperfect world How perfect FD Thornton, 2012

I usually write stuff that is either a little uplifting or at lest honest. Either honest about myself or my beliefs on life in general. Today, I am a bit reflective.  A young friend of mine was telling me how he had been taking inventory of himself. Looking for the good and tossing out the bad. And, you know that's OK. Sometimes you have to look at yourself and the things around you and have a "spring cleaning".  Still, one of the things that I regret through the years is the time I spent running and doing.  By that I mean, while I was doing, doing, doing, I missed a lot. The little things that make your life worth it. But  all that is now "water under the bridge". You can't dwell on regrets or mistakes, you just move on the best you can.  So to my young friend all I can say is, don't let life move by you so fast that you end up wasting a big chuck of it. Pause and breathe. Because one morning you'll wake up and wonder, who's that old man s...

A little over four years ago I took a look at my situation and thought, "I can do better than this." So over the next four years I worked to reach a few goals. One I got a college degree, it hasn't paid me back yet, but still, I hold an Associates Degree and have for nearly two years.  Next, I'm working to complete my Bachelors Degree. It's been a hard and trying two years but my goal is getting closer and closer. With the finish line on the final lap in October of this year. Another personal goal that hasn't paid off yet, but again, no one can take away.  Now as Summer approaches, I'm finding more and more opportunities coming my way. One job search site alone has produced several positions that need filled in the Savannah area. Each has jobs that I can do, they all need a number of different IT skill sets that I have.  It's hard to remember four years ago I was going nowhere, doing something I was totally bored at. Knowing that inside myself I ...

Been reading text for school since early this morning. So while taking a break I decided to check on family and friends on Facebook. Nothing really going on except one young friend got an invite to join a meditation temple? I clicked the link (because I'm always nosy about these things) to check them out.  I guess it's mostly about humming and clearing your mind and hugging a tree or two. Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against others beliefs, this is a country that welcomes all, right? But there was one thing about this organization that upset me. One thing that raised my already high blood pressure. No one over the age of 39 can join.  Really? You know, I can hum with the best of them. And, as far as clearing my mind, it goes blank all the time. So to tell me I can't go to your "church" 'cause I'm too old. Hey, your only as old as you think you are and I think I'm still not too old to hum.  

UoP Alumni on Facebook asked what was my favorite fruit (for fruit and veggie month, I think). So I replied, strawberries and soft stone fruits. It got me thinking for a minute, why I'm I so fat if I eat plenty of veggies and fruit? The obvious reason is sitting in front of this thing (PC) and sugary drinks. I usually don't eat a great amount of food. But like a former Doctor of mine pointed out, when you don't burn the calories you take in they get stored (fat). So I either needed to cut calorie intake or move more or both to drop weight. It makes sense to me. So I guess I'll simple try and move farther then to just my bed to the computer table and back, with an occasional field trip to the bathroom. Maybe I can go outside and do stuff like pick-up the fallen branches (don't ask, that's a whole other post) and trim my hedges. I usually do that, but lately I've had he blaahs. But maybe I could kill that blaah feeling with a little moving around? That...