That Old Spector

Every so often I can get a bit lazy. So instead of writing different posts for the various sites I write on, I'll borrow from one site to another. Well this is going to be one of those post. I write a support post for an international support site for people like myself that suffer with Panic/Anxiety Disorder. I thought that the words I wrote could speak to others who may not suffer from PAD, but do have moments of panic and fear.
While earlier in the week I was going through a phase of normal, the last few days, especially today, I've been "feeling" tense and out of it. So much so that I was really wondering which way was up and have had problems wrapping my head around this week's assignments.

As all this was going on my head was spinning, my stomach was in knots, and my focus was nonexistent. I finally put every thing down and focused on nothing. Mind you, I didn't go into a mediation, I just allowed my spinning mind to rest a few minutes. After a short time of that, my focused improved and my stomach eased up.

Right after this occurred I knew I was going to have to write this down. Not so much to show how I'm overcoming panic. But to show that even when we feel our best this specter of anxiety/panic can come up at a moments notice.

Another point I'd like to make is staying vigilant about panic isn't a good thing either. I may not be a trained counselor or psychologist, but I've lived through this long enough to have an opinion. If you stay on edge waiting to fight anxiety/panic at a moments notice, you're still not living either. Being wise enough to see the signs and working to let go have been my best tools at being my normal self.

This has not been an overnight victory, it has been a continuing journey of many years. Another thing I've learned is, being vocal and not cowering in a corner about my situation has really helped me overcome and find support. So don't sit in the dark and hide, open the windows of your soul and live.

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