I Know I Can Be

I don’t think of myself as not much of a materialistic person. I mean I have my gadgets, but even those are nothing more than apps on my phone. Checking in with my publisher this morning, I was pleasantly surprised by the sales of my latest self-help/confessional book (#try). And while I hope that each copy brings a little light to each person who reads it. Knowing that people appreciate your work enough to pay for it is a rewarding and humbling experience.

Spending a good chunk of your life under a cloud of self-doubt kills whatever potential you may have. And no matter how successful you may eventually become, you always have that seed of failure planted in your soul. I know that for me those seeds of self-hatred and pain, still haunt my thoughts and dreams. By burying those thoughts you only plant the seeds deeper. Denying the seeds even exist only waters them even more.

The thing is those seeds are planted there, rather you like it or not. But I discovered that by giving those fears a voice and by listening to them compassionately. Are you able to bring that pain to the surface where you can eventually let it go. Listen I’m not a therapist or some Guru on a hilltop. I’m just a man who lives with a lot self-doubt. All I know is I’ve tried a 1000 different things to deal with my inner demons. And all I can tell you is, by embracing the hurt child within me and telling him he’s loved. I am now able to make peace with myself and to take the steps I have taken to be the person I know I can be. The secret to it all is simply trying. 

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