In the Late Afternoon

It’s just me and George in the late afternoon, he’s getting a little antsy waiting for his Momma to get home. He’s whimpering while looking out the window. Unfortunately, he doesn’t see any comfort in me. That’s because I’m the adult in the room, while my daughter is “Mommy”, the young and energetic one. All he gets from me is the occasional partner that tosses the tennis ball and puts him outside. You can’t blame me though, after all I’m a cat person; I find dogs to be too…needy.

At the moment I’m reminded of the fragility of this life. The energy and endless possibilities of oneself we all carried and left behind to pursue life. I often joke (much to the horror of my family) about my warranty expiring at age 59. But I mean seriously, my parents didn’t leave me with much of a genetic legacy. But now at age 58, the shits getting real. At times like this, I feel like God’s paying me back for all the times I am a jerk (notice I didn’t say was a jerk).

I suppose I’m paying some sort of penance for a life lived as a rebel without a clue. A life lived just below its potential. But what is potential any damn way? But something you look forward to in the future. After spending so much of my life looking off into the horizon. It’s kinda nice to appreciate what I have here and now. God only knows how much longer I got (I know, sorry). But being in this moment seems to suit me. It leaves me appreciating the little things that life gives. It opens my mind to deeper focus and a greater freedom to just be.  


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Fail-Safe

Image
Through the paper-thin walls of this old house, I can hear my neighbors getting ready for another day. Laying here remember when I used to do that, working at night so I could take care of the kids, while my wife went to work. Yesterday sorta marked a tipping point for me I suppose. I finally got my consultation with the gastroenterologist. So we are working the set-up some tests my primary care physician has been wanting for me to have for months. While I would love nothing more than to tell my PCP, “I told you so”. But I suppose knowing is better than not knowing. Although I do find some comfort in ignorant bliss.  I get the impression some people feel I am an optimist. But I like to think of myself more as a realist. What some may mistake as optimism is actually nothing more than analytics. Where I breakdown a given situation and create a solution. That may sound cold and frankly less romantic. But you must understand, after living so long in a void of no emotion (due to
Read more

Focus on Living

Image
Me and my bride just got back from the big store chain that doesn’t compensate me for mentioning them, so I won’t. Last night it was stuffy and hot with the temperature hovering around 80° at midnight. So I woke up dizzy with a headache. Even after dropping my morning meds, the headache and lightheadedness still hasn’t gone away. Long story short, after putting the groceries put up, I’m now sitting in the shade of the trees in our backyard. There’s not much to write about at the moment other than I also have an enormous crick in my neck. Which may go a long ways in explaining my dizziness. Still down the street a neighbor is getting their grass mowed. Our lawn was mowed Tuesday by Mr. Brown, with this being the first time I’ve been outside in a couple of weeks. Between the headache and the dizziness, there’s sharp pain is running down my leg again. Reminding me if nothing else most physical and some emotional pain will definitely teach you a little about patience. In bet
Read more

Blowing Breeze

Image
It’s later in the afternoon so I decided to take advantage of the lighter humidity and come back outside. There’s a lite breeze blowing so while the gnats are still out, at least they’re having to put in some extra effort to lite on me. You can still smell where the grass got cut this morning, but sadly the faint scent of BBQ from the restaurant down the street is gone.  The poor old sycamore tree leaves look a bit sad. Hanging like they’re on their last leg from the limbs. There’s no point in bringing up the fig bush/tree, it’s all but shed most of its leaves. It’s hard to believe that just a few months ago both plants were vibrant and green, with a bountiful crop of figs. But the birds have mostly abandon their nest in the fig branches. With the kids grown and the shade and food supply dried up, I can’t say I blame them.  But I’m the human here, I’m adaptable with opposable thumbs. I can’t move on as easily as the birds. My so-called cognitive reasoning insist I stick aro
Read more