Leftovers
Since I'm going through a little writer's block, I decided to clean out my frig, if you will. Over the last few months I've collected a number of half finished stories. So instead of waiting for the inspiration to come, I think I'll post them as they are and let everyone who reads then, finish 'em themselves. I laid them out in order from oldest draft to latest. So enjoy.
A Tale of Two Friends
Recently I was looking at some photos of an old friend of mine. For some silly reason I thought how old he looked, not thinking how damn old I look to him. While I looked at the pictures of him and his family, I couldn't help but think of how we had changed over the years. Then I thought about the similarities and the differences we had taken in our lives since we were attached at the hip.
I started my family a little earlier than he did. In fact, I divorced and married again before my friend married to first time. As you may have figured, this was the dividing line of our friendship. Getting serious in a relationship will do that to friends...
What is Real?
Over the many years I've walked the earth, I've worn more hats than I care to recall. I've been a son, a friend, a lover, a husband, and a dad. And while I've worn no hat for very long I worn each as best I could. You ever have a moment where you lose your sense of direction? I mean for a while you thought you were on the right course, then all of a sudden you lose your heading.
When I look at where my course is now going, I really have to ask myself, is this where I want to be? I often think that think too much. That's what my wife often tells me, and judging from how well she sleeps compared to me, she's probably right. I often wonder if their is such a thing as a fear of failure, where you work to get something then once you're there you're so paralyzed with fear you just stand there a take the electrocution...
Fear
Around 70 years ago President Roosevelt made the statement, "Only thing we have to fear is fear itself." The reason I brought this up is because I have been pretty anxious about the class I started yesterday. Even after starting the class I had trouble sleeping last night about it.
Anyway after getting up and really digging into the course I began to calm down and understand what it is I'm going to take from this class. So after doing my work in class today, I went to the store for some stuff and while driving back home the line from Roosevelt came to my mind, "is fear itself."
The meaning of that line to me is don't let fear overtake you. As best you can take your fears on, don't let fear rule your life. Some of you may be thinking, that this is something easy for someone like me to do. If you haven't read a lot of my stuff you may not realize that each day to have to push myself to get through my day. All be it, it's way easier than it was years ago. Still I have to be mindful of my attitude and my desire to win.
As the news from this weeks tragedies hint us in the face all day. That is but another reminder that fear cannot be allowed to win. If you suffer from the fear of fear ask for help. Somewhere it is out there for you. Use whatever means you have to realize that what is happening to you doesn't have to rule your life...
Mind, Body, & Soul
When you get ill or have an accident we all knows what that can do. My recent trouble has really set me back...
The Things That Keep Me Up
As some of you know, I injured myself and I have a painful pinched nerve in my arm and shoulder. It has very much restricted my moving around and my ability to work comfortably. It is getting better but still, it hurts. For the first two weeks I sleep poorly, getting up a number of times at night. But even without the pain, I have always been a unusual sleeper. For one I get awaken by dreams or solutions to problems or ideas that I come up with.
I don't really know why I do this. Maybe I'm too much of a worrier and some sleep releases the tension and the solution comes. Or maybe the quiet of the evening allows me to think freely without interruption. Maybe it's a little of both situations.
Either way, when I do wake up at night I try and use the time to work on things. I don't spend it staring at the ceiling or flipping tv channels. Even picking up a book is a better use of the time I'm awaken...
Spinning My Wheels
Enjoying my time off, sorta'. On one hand I'm glad to have the time recoup and get better. But at the same time as I get better I tend to get the feeling I'm "spinning my wheels" while I'm standing still. So I'm trying to tell myself, hold on cowboy, let's make sure we don't tear up what we just fixed.
I guess that's where I sitting at today, between waiting a few more weeks and hitting the gas and taking off. One of the gifts my 50 years have given me is a lot more patients and a lot less impulsiveness. Which I hate to tell my younger readers, isn't too bad of a deal.
Over the week I've been off, I've had plenty of time job searching. The biggest difference I've noticed in these last few months is the increase in help wanted ads and growing number from this area. So I've taken advantage of this and have been filing away applications and sending resumes.
Payback
When you get my age the individuals you depended on for advance seem to start thinning out. The parents, aunts and uncles, older co-workers, and grandparents, we all looked up to when we were younger, let's face it, can't live forever. What this fact tells me is that while the people I count on are no longer here, I still Am. So why should I let all the great advice over the years fade with me, when it could benefit someone else...
A Tale of Two Friends
Recently I was looking at some photos of an old friend of mine. For some silly reason I thought how old he looked, not thinking how damn old I look to him. While I looked at the pictures of him and his family, I couldn't help but think of how we had changed over the years. Then I thought about the similarities and the differences we had taken in our lives since we were attached at the hip.
I started my family a little earlier than he did. In fact, I divorced and married again before my friend married to first time. As you may have figured, this was the dividing line of our friendship. Getting serious in a relationship will do that to friends...
What is Real?
Over the many years I've walked the earth, I've worn more hats than I care to recall. I've been a son, a friend, a lover, a husband, and a dad. And while I've worn no hat for very long I worn each as best I could. You ever have a moment where you lose your sense of direction? I mean for a while you thought you were on the right course, then all of a sudden you lose your heading.
When I look at where my course is now going, I really have to ask myself, is this where I want to be? I often think that think too much. That's what my wife often tells me, and judging from how well she sleeps compared to me, she's probably right. I often wonder if their is such a thing as a fear of failure, where you work to get something then once you're there you're so paralyzed with fear you just stand there a take the electrocution...
Fear
Around 70 years ago President Roosevelt made the statement, "Only thing we have to fear is fear itself." The reason I brought this up is because I have been pretty anxious about the class I started yesterday. Even after starting the class I had trouble sleeping last night about it.
Anyway after getting up and really digging into the course I began to calm down and understand what it is I'm going to take from this class. So after doing my work in class today, I went to the store for some stuff and while driving back home the line from Roosevelt came to my mind, "is fear itself."
The meaning of that line to me is don't let fear overtake you. As best you can take your fears on, don't let fear rule your life. Some of you may be thinking, that this is something easy for someone like me to do. If you haven't read a lot of my stuff you may not realize that each day to have to push myself to get through my day. All be it, it's way easier than it was years ago. Still I have to be mindful of my attitude and my desire to win.
As the news from this weeks tragedies hint us in the face all day. That is but another reminder that fear cannot be allowed to win. If you suffer from the fear of fear ask for help. Somewhere it is out there for you. Use whatever means you have to realize that what is happening to you doesn't have to rule your life...
Mind, Body, & Soul
When you get ill or have an accident we all knows what that can do. My recent trouble has really set me back...
The Things That Keep Me Up
As some of you know, I injured myself and I have a painful pinched nerve in my arm and shoulder. It has very much restricted my moving around and my ability to work comfortably. It is getting better but still, it hurts. For the first two weeks I sleep poorly, getting up a number of times at night. But even without the pain, I have always been a unusual sleeper. For one I get awaken by dreams or solutions to problems or ideas that I come up with.
I don't really know why I do this. Maybe I'm too much of a worrier and some sleep releases the tension and the solution comes. Or maybe the quiet of the evening allows me to think freely without interruption. Maybe it's a little of both situations.
Either way, when I do wake up at night I try and use the time to work on things. I don't spend it staring at the ceiling or flipping tv channels. Even picking up a book is a better use of the time I'm awaken...
Spinning My Wheels
Enjoying my time off, sorta'. On one hand I'm glad to have the time recoup and get better. But at the same time as I get better I tend to get the feeling I'm "spinning my wheels" while I'm standing still. So I'm trying to tell myself, hold on cowboy, let's make sure we don't tear up what we just fixed.
I guess that's where I sitting at today, between waiting a few more weeks and hitting the gas and taking off. One of the gifts my 50 years have given me is a lot more patients and a lot less impulsiveness. Which I hate to tell my younger readers, isn't too bad of a deal.
Over the week I've been off, I've had plenty of time job searching. The biggest difference I've noticed in these last few months is the increase in help wanted ads and growing number from this area. So I've taken advantage of this and have been filing away applications and sending resumes.
Payback
When you get my age the individuals you depended on for advance seem to start thinning out. The parents, aunts and uncles, older co-workers, and grandparents, we all looked up to when we were younger, let's face it, can't live forever. What this fact tells me is that while the people I count on are no longer here, I still Am. So why should I let all the great advice over the years fade with me, when it could benefit someone else...
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