Alone Time

Ever since we moved our family West some 21 years ago, we have been a bit isolated from friends and loved ones. While the move can be an adventure you still get a little homesick. But isn't that the way it's suppose to be, you leave your family and move on to stake your own claim in the world. Still it doesn't relieve the isolation you can feel. 

 Maybe it's just us? I mean it has been 21 years since we left Savannah, still at times it feels like another world. Maybe it's the death of my parents and my wife's mother that gives us this feeling of us against the world. Maybe it's just our personality types. Whatever way, even with four adult children, a sort-of-son-in-law, and a grandbaby on the way, you can still feel it's just you and the four walls. 

 I guess it could be the security, I mean most people at are age are settled secure with a mortgage, a little 401 K, and a plan for retirement. Hell, all I see is working till I drop dead with my dying words being, "Welcome to Wally-World, may I get you a buggy?" I planned for a future, I do hold two going on three college degrees, but it may have been too little too late. 

 I'm genuinely not trying to depress anyone, I'm just looking at the facts. I'm also not blaming anyone, no one put a gun to my head and said live this way. I guess it all comes down to what you are comfortable with. At the moment I'm comfortable, I'm not rich nor do I have a five year plan written out. What I do have is an weird comfortableness (yes, it's a word) with myself, that I'm more than sure comes off as arrogance to some. (Of course that could be just my fantasy.) 

 I suppose what I'm getting at is, where I Am in my life is where I've allowed myself to go. And that only I have the ability to improve my life or make it worst. Despite all my phobias and problems, the fact that I have a pretty good grasp of who I Am allows me a bit of insight into my stupidity. In other words when it occurs, I can hopefully correct it. In a way, isn't that all we can ask of ourselves. To be enough of a person to admit wrong and correct our mistakes. 

 As we each walk our own path, let us not regret where we have been, as much as, learn from it. Then apply those corrections to our path and our lives. 

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