The Person YOU Are

Time has a way of changing who we are. Rather we see it or not over the course of time we all change. I know that in many ways I’m not the person I was when I was younger. Things like death, life, health, and love change us in ways we can’t see clearly when measured from our own prospective of time. It’s kinda like how we don’t notice the changes in our own appearance over time. But when you find a picture of an old friend on Facebook and the first thing you think is, “damn they look old.” In its own subtle way that’s how time changes us. 

 Several years ago my health changed and so did my attitude toward family and friendship. I became much more isolated, preferring to spend my time either alone or in the company of a very close few. It’s sorta strange to me how I came to be this way, considering how openly friendly I can still be. But over the past year or so I’ve been gaining a whole new prospective about who I feel comfortable being. The sly reclusive that doesn’t have much of an opinion or the boisterous fellow that easily embarrasses children to this day. 

 To be honest I kinda like both of these elements within myself. It’s fun to let people that have only seen my quieter side see me putting myself “out there”. And it’s just as much fun letting does that know me only and a blow-heart, smart-ass write something that can be reflective and even thought provoking. I think the key to being able to pull off all parts of your self is by approaching those parts of with a degree of sincerity and honesty.

 For far too long I created this exterior image of myself that hardly looked anything like the interior. In other words the outside had a manicured lawn with trimmed hedges and pretty smelling flowers. But the inside was worse than just an empty shell; there was a lot of ugly, rotten, moldy junk on the inside. It’s been over the last year that I’ve opened my eyes to this reality and really started making changes. So that now I’ve gotten to the point that the outside ain’t near as pretty and the inside doesn’t smell too bad. 

 Listen, we can’t help but change, it’s kinda times thing. But what we can do is become honest and sincere enough with ourselves to except it and improve what needs improving. Lord knows I don’t like being a wall flower all the time or do I need to run my mouth 24/7. The thing is be who you feel most comfortable being and let life sort out the rest. Spending all your time trying to be someone you’re not only leaves you feeling like an insincere liar.      

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